Beyond Happy

It’s not a destination. It’s not an ultimate goal. It’s not the be-all and end-all. Happiness is an emotion. Happiness is a sensation. Happiness is ever-evolving signal of one thing: progress.

What if there’s more to life than mere hedonic happiness?

This week I sat in on a webinar titled, Pursuit of Happiness: Resilience & Positive Psychology, hosted by Dr. Michael Howard, a renowned neuropsychologist for over 45 years. He emphasized how an individual’s life satisfaction is determined by his or her capacity to minimize negativity and maximize positive emotions. He discussed the interplay of engagement, relationships, meaning and accomplishment to derive lasting well-being. He talked about the downsides of loneliness and the power of courage.

Shared in his PowerPoint presentation, here is the list of “Nine Things Very Happy People Do,” according to Dr. Howard:

1. Show resilience by coping in the face of challenges

2. Devote a larger quantity of their time with family and friends

3. Offer helping hands as random acts of kindness (with coworkers, for example)

4. Savor and engage mindfully in life’s pleasures

5. Express gratitude for all they have

6. Accept and forgive oneself and others

7. Remain committed and dedicated to life-long goals by having strong core beliefs about their own unique meaning and purpose

8. Exercise regularly while maintaining healthy lifestyle habits

9. Practice optimism when imagining future outcome

Which ones do you engage in consistently? Which ones do you want to make a conscious effort to engage in more regularly? Who comes to mind when you read these nine?

~ It’s not about how great a circumstance could be… it’s about how great we could be in any circumstance. ~

If I were to give advice to my 10-year-old self, I’d say: find and follow true mentors and role models, not influencers. 

If I were to give advice to my 20-year-old self, I’d say: focus on responsibility, not happiness. 

If I were to give advice to my 30-year-old self, I’d say: concentrate on loyalty, not novelty.

Happiness is similar to the fizzling bubbles in soda — it’s momentary and fleeting. Joy, meaning, and purpose… on the other hand… are the sunlight, water, and air of life — they provide hidden reservoirs of energy, enthusiasm, and vitality.

We want what’s real. We want what’s authentically true to us. We want what’s lasting.

That’s where the word “dedication” comes in…

Dedication (noun): to make something holy or to stick to something for a very long time.

Don’t we make something holy when we stick to something for a very long time?

The emotion and signal of happiness let us know if we are on the right track; however, human flourishing is a byproduct of unwavering dedication.

Which place have you dedicated hundreds to thousands of hours of your time to? What cause do you feel drawn to dedicate yourself toward? Who deserves your dedication?

Born in Austria on February 2nd 1875, Fritz Kreisler started playing the violin shortly after he could walk. By the age of seven, Kreisler entered the Vienna Conservatory. Five years later, he won the Premier Prix in Paris, an award usually won by musicians twice his age. People described Kreisler as a prodigy before his 12th birthday.

Nevertheless, his success was not based on mere natural talent. Throughout his teenage years, he devoted hours each day reading, practicing, and playing music. In 1899, he performed the Beethoven Violin Concerto in Berlin — this concert solidified him as one of leading violinists throughout Europe and ignited his international solo tour. His style, known as “continuous vibrato,” later became the norm in violin playing.

Late into his career, after a concert, a woman rushed backstage and exclaimed: “Mr. Fritz Kreisler, I’d give my whole life to play as beautifully as you do!” Kreisler smiled and replied, “I did.”

Sacrifice novelty for loyalty.

Use happiness as a signal of progress.

Create a meaningful life through dedication.

— MG